Friday, March 23, 2012

March 23, 2012 Smackdown TV Report

Nine days from WrestleMania, and it's Smackdown tonight.  So here we go...

Daniel Bryan and AJ are out to great heat.  DB says he will still be champ after Mania and he tells AJ to tell everyone what it's like to be in love with the World Heavyweight Champion.  First, AJ says that she has a match tonight but Bryan interrupts her and tells her to stick to the subject at hand.  She really seems enthusiastic about her match tonight.  She sums up her relationship by saying it's heaven and that DB's lips are very soft.  Sometimes, they even spoon!  Yes, she said that.  She also says that Danny's body is a temple and he makes her feel safe.  However, Bryan reminds her not to call him Danny in public.  Bryan interrupts her and whispers into her ear as if telling her to say something.  She is reluctant at first but eventually she says that he is a great lover.  This is all to very good heat for the two.  She ends by saying DB will make Sheamus tap at Mania and he will be on his way to becoming the greatest of all-time.  Sheamus comes out and says he threw up a little listening to them both.  He calls DB a sniveling coward as the crowd chants Danny because Sheamus called him that.  Sheamus actually prefers to call him Danny Boy, which the crowd starts chanting.  He says he will beat DB at Mania.  Great segment here even though Sheamus comes across as being a little one-dimensional.  Every time I see him in this build he seems to say the same things in his interviews.  He is over though and the WWE likes face champions and books towards them.  He looks strong for Mania.

R-Truth v. Mark Henry-This was meant to make Henry look good and powerful.  Of course, when he loses on RAW everything gets undermined.  Truth tries to fight Henry but gets cut off by a headbutt and gets hit with a couple clubbing blows to the back.  Truth tries fighting back but gets shut down and thrown outside.  Henry said he was taking out the trash.  He grinds Truth's face into the steps and sends him back in.  He says he is calling the shots but he misses a big elbow.  Then, Truth hits a dropkick and a Miz-like short DDT but only gets a two-count.  Truth goes up top and tries for a crossbody but Mark catches him and hits the World's Strongest Slam for the win.  On the way out, he tells a fan off-camera that they could be next.  I love Mark's ad-libbed lines that he does!  * and a quarter.

They played the Yokozuna Hall of Fame video and then a recap of Zack Ryder's rally to get onto Team Teddy from RAW.  This led to Santino, Ryder, Kofi, and Aksana with Teddy in his office.  Ryder pleads with Teddy to let him on the team but Teddy says he does not want the distractions that Ryder would bring.  I guess he was talking about Eve.  Ryder says he has a surprise that will surely help him change his mind.  He brings in Hornswaggle with a Team Teddy flag and says he will be Teddy's mascot for Mania.  Teddy loves this idea but he still says no to Ryder.  Ryder then brings out The Greak Khali in Ryder gear and he does the Woo Woo Woo You Know It thing and Teddy changes his mind.  Khali and Ryder are both on the team.  Teddy must be on that sauce if that is all it takes to change his mind.  Maybe he shouldn't be running Smackdown if he can be swayed that easily.  He also has a lousy team filled with losers.

AJ w/Daniel Bryan v. Brie Bella-Nice cameltoe on the Bellas.  Does me saying that ruin my credibility, what little I have?  This was a bad match that started with some headlocks by Brie.  AJ ends up hitting a standing elbow but Nikki comes onto the apron and clotheslines her when the ref wasn't looking.  AJ eventually tries for a roll-up but gets a two-count and another clothesline in return.  AJ got thrown into the ropes and reversed it into La Mistica which looked beyond awful.  Plus, she runs the ropes about as good as Kelly Kelly.  Brie doesn't submit as Nikki got up on the apron again trying to distract AJ.  Brie ran to hit AJ but AJ ducked and she hit Nikki instead.  AJ then hit a roll-up for the win and Bryan came in to celebrate.  He nearly left the ring without AJ until he remembered to come to her.  This segment wasn't over yet though as Nikki got in the ring said that her and her sister disagree on who they think will win between Teddy and Johnny.  She is on Team Teddy and starts a Team Teddy cheer.  This sucked too.  She was playing heavy heel for the match, more so than her sister and yet she is the one siding with Team Teddy.  *

Vickie is out to introduce Jack Swagger, whose facials while doing pushups look goofy as hell. 
Jack Swagger v. Zack Ryder-Zack versus Jack here and this was a better outing for Ryder than Monday's match.  He came out with Hornswaggle and his flag which got annoying real quick.  That Mania match has so much going on it'll be a trainwreck.  I can imagine Hornie running around the whole time with that flag, which will get old fast.  Swagger got control and started mat wrestling with Ryder but Zack hit a roll-up, got a two-count, and gained control.  Swagger shoved him into a corner and nailed a powerslam for a two-count.  Then, he pounds Ryder in the corner and goes after a wrist lock.  He uses the wrist lock to throw him around a little and puts in a key lock.  Ryder chants are going off and Ryder begins his comeback with a big mule kick in the corner.  He hits a clothesline, facebuster, and a running forearm in the corner to set-up the Broski Boot.  He only gets a two after that but has good heat.  He goes for the Ruff Ryder but it gets countered into a powerbomb into the corner and then a Swagger Bomb.  Hornswaggle starts chasing Vickie who jumps onto the apron distracting Swagger who runs into a Rough Ryder for the win.  * and three quarters.

Recap Cody/Show stuff from RAW and Cody's punches still look like shit.  Striker is in the back and hunts down Cody for his thoughts.  He enjoyed Monday and Show's biggest embarrassment is yet to come at Mania.  It will be when he loses to Cody this year on April Fools Day.  He says he has a plane to catch and leaves.

Big Show v. Kane-They start by going back and forth with shots and moves.  Kane hits a clothesline and goes for a second attempt but misses.  Kane ran outside but Show chases after him.  Kane was pinned against the steel post as Show attempts a clothesline which misses.  Kane gets him back inside and nails a dropkick and nearfall.  He puts Show in a chinlock which gets reversed and they both go for clotheslines that cancel each other out.  Show begins a comeback with punches, some headbutts, and a shoulder tackle but he misses a clothesline and Kane counters with a DDT.  Kane goes up top after a nearfall but gets caught in a chokeslam.  Cody runs out from the crowd and nails Show for a DQ finish.  He runs right back out and Show chases him but can't catch him.  Out comes Orton who hits an RKO on Kane and he stands tall.  This stuff was slightly more interesting than Monday's build for these two matches.  * and three quarters, decent, quick big man match.

Heath Slater v. Brodus Clay-Cameron's ass is amazing!  Slater is outside mocking Brodus' dancing and he looks goofy.  He is a pretty decent jobber and I hope they keep him around for that.  Slater gets shoved down and Brodus goes for an elbow.  He tries for a back body drop but Slater counters and hits a dropkick and he goes on offense.  This doesn't last long and eventually Brodus hits his headbutt to the stomach, a running knee, a suplex variation, and the splash for the finish.  *

Eve and Ryder are in the back talking and Zack ends up insulting her on accident and she cancels their dinner for later and walks away.  She smiles as she's walking. 

Recap of HBK/HHH/Taker stuff from RAW.

Christian is out for commentary. 
Great Khali v. Dolph Ziggler-Ace, Otunga, Teddy, and Aksana are all out for this one.  Ziggler tries to avoid Khali and then tries hitting him but gets shut down.  Dolph runs out but gets thrown back in from the apron.  Khali goes for some chops in the corners but Ziggler ends up hitting a dropkick to the knee to shut him down afterwards.  He beats up up on the ground and hooks in a front face lock.  Bad idea.  Khali throws him out of it, hits a clothesline but misses a chop and Ziggler nails a sleeper and Lauranaitis calls for the bell.  Teddy says the match isn't over and Dolph has until ten to get back in the ring and restart or he will lose.  He does not return and loses until Kofi and Santino run down and throw him back in so Khali can beat on him.  Teddy, Khali, Kofi, and Santino all dance.  *

CM Punk/Sheamus v. Daniel Bryan/The Miz-Cole thinks DB should run Smackdown.  Sheamus begins with DB but DB tags out right away.  Sheamus throws some headlocks and throws on Miz.  The Miz tries for a hip toss but this was blocked into a clothesline and a tag to Punk.  Punk nails an elbow off the top and gets a nearfall.  Punk chant going and a tag to Sheamus who slingshots in to nail The Miz.  Sheamus misses a backdrop and Miz hits his backbreaker that was countered.  Sheamus tosses in DB who ran away and this leads to Miz getting the upperhand as he throws Sheamus out.  DB hit his dropkick outside which leads to a commercial.  Afterwards, Miz has a chinlock on Sheamus who powers out and tags in Punk.  Punk hits his usual stuff starting with a springboard clothesline.  He went after Bryan and Miz hit his DDT for a nearfall.  Bryan comes in and is on the attack with kneedrops as Danny Boy chants begin.  Miz eventually comes in after some offense and hits a high knee and throws in a cravat.  Punk battles out and goes for the GTS that Miz countered into a backbreaker that was then countered into Punk's high spinning kick to the head.  Punk makes the tag as did Bryan and Sheamus runs right through him.  He did his clubbing forearms and then hit a powerslam.  Bryan gets a tag and runs but Sheamus chases after him.  The Miz tries to attack but Sheamus hits the Brogue Kick for the win.  ** and a quarter

Pretty boring show with the only highlights being the opening stuff with Bryan and AJ.  The Kane/Show match was fun and I almost gave that ** if it weren't for the finish.  The main was decent but not as good as the six-man from last week.  Thanks folks, feel free to comment.

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